No. 12: What is Love?
August 20th 2008 18:04
Maybe you do not want to know what love could be. This is okay. For you who do not care about defining it, just ignore this post. You may be right. But for some of us, it is not just enough to love the ballads, the sonnets, the love poems, art, movies and personal emotional surges. These are all great and enough cannot be said to praise them and how they make us feel. On the other hand, some of us want to understand love a bit more. For this realization we have to probe much further than the surface.
Ask most any elementary school child, "What is love?" He or she will usually respond with shrugged shoulders and, maybe, a canned response parroting his or her parents. Ten years later, ask the same question of a young adult and the reply would mostly be something like this: "I cannot put it into words, but I know what it feels like, and I like it." A senior citizen reflecting on years of ups and downs, possibly in and out of relationships, may say,"It is why I feel I have fought the good fight. It is the reason for my happiness. It keeps me going."
People throughout history have tried to give an absolute definition of this most complex four-letter word. The ancient Greek philosophers told us there are three types of love: 1) Fraternal -- that between friends and other fellow beings, 2) familial -- self-explanatory love between parents, children, siblings, and other relatives, 3) amorous -- the one culturally emphasized the most; the one we desire, strive for and usually experience the deepest.
The most common response to this "what is" question is multifaceted. People usually reply that it is affection, devotion, strong attachment, a warm feeling when contemplated, excitement, heart throbbing, breath taking, respect, adoration, self sacrificing and so forth. But could these wonderful explanations just be the symptoms of a much deeper process?
Please ride the curves with me on this one --
The whole meaning of the word gets stronger and more complex when one considers that the Bible equates God with love. You have read it, it says "God is love" -- one of the most repeated and profound phrases in human history. For the sake of argument, let us assume this is true, and our Creator IS love, then to define love, perhaps one needs to consider the true characteristics of God. For now, let us not get into the personality of the Biblical God since this should be a topic for many more posts. But, rather, let us ask, "What is the one characteristic of our Creator that stands out the most?" Am I wrong when I submit that it is the creative ability to bring order out of chaos?
Throughout the universe from the largest galaxies to the smallest microscopic item, we recognize that without some order arranging the molecules there would be nothing but open chaos. If there is a God (you give your own description) then this Supreme Identity, as the renowned theologian, Alan Watts, called "It," (excuse, please) is somehow responsible for bringing order out of chaos. Otherwise, sub-atomic particles and atoms might not exist at all, or would exist in disarray at the least. All this advancement to higher states of existence (matter) seem to imply to each of us that we are the result of some Higher Guidance that we call God.
Now, with that heavy handedness written, please consider looking at love from another perspective. We are hormonally designed to seek companionship, and its nurturing, in order to stabilize our environmental perceptions and our responses to what is outside us. This is needed as well, to perpetuate the ongoing flow of DNA for our species' survival.
Imagine, you are alone. Your hormones are raging! You are seeking attachment and nurturing. At this point you are in a chaotic state. But then, your whole body, mind and spirit lock in on someone. As the relationship progresses all of these chaotic feelings, and uncertainties level out and harmony results. Your confidence and self-esteem are elevated and you grow in harmony with this other person.
All of the physical and emotional attributes listed above exhibit themselves within and without. YOU ARE IN LOVE! As this love grows, less and less chaos exists. Some of your early hormonal infatuations
grow dimmer while others increase. You find you are driven less by negative emotions, and are driven more by positive thoughts and "love" elevates to a higher state of mind. Your overall spirit is elevated.
The risk of trying to define love is that we fear the loss of something wonderful by exposing its core. Understanding what is going on here does not have to reduce our appreciation of love or our desire to experience it. Instead it can open up the spirituality of it all. If love is fraternal, familial and amorous, then we can see how understanding this strong manifestation can help us to overcome the temptations of letting our emotions burst forth in negative rages of anger, jealousy, envy, hatred, etc. Appreciating what is really happening can also help us experience love to its highest form and grow more like the God so beautifully described as equal to love itself. Emulating this surely looks like a positive highway for all of us to be traveling. It is for me.
Keep it between the lines...
| 50 |
| Vote |
Shared on
Subscribe to this blog
